The Book
Review on Amazon of One
Day at a Time ~ Mel's Story from April 27th 2011
"I had to review what has been one of the
best books I've read this year.
Mel was just 20 years old, a student at Aston University and a football loving
girl who was clearly adored by her family and friends alike. This book charts
the day when the family were told she had cancer (and in fact the amount of
other diagnosis she had in the preceding couple of months) and the journey that
they all follow throughout the illnesses' progression. This isn't a book with a
happy ending, yet the way in which the family pull together and deal with the
news and terrible symptoms and side effects is somehow incredibly uplifting.
Ian, Mel's Dad, has contributed large chunks of a blog he wrote to help keep
everyone updated. He is a natural writer, and should definitely write more
please! He is so, so honest, as is Mel in the facebook posts that she wrote and
are also included.
If you are currently living with any long term illness, this books will be an
incredible comfort. To know that others are muddling through, not knowing how to
manage, and screaming at the unfair benefits system, is like being tucked up
with a teddy bear. It seems much more alright, because it isn't just you
wondering how you're going to function long enough to cook a meal, let alone eat
it. Yes, this is the voice of painful experience. But it is also amazing for
those who have family members, friends, or colleagues facing long term acute or
terminal diagnosis. It tells you the things about illness that the 'how to deal
with you illness books' leave out. Like please send books/films/games/etc as
being stuck in bed unable to move is incredibly boring. I will treasure these
things more than you could understand. Or the side effects of the drugs
sometimes being worse than the illness, and are sometimes embarrassing and
horrible. Or that no matter how much you plan a lovely day out, everything has
to change at the last minute if you're not well enough.
What an impact this book has had on me. I picked it up from our local library,
but am ordering my own copy and one for lending out to others to help them
understand the frustrations and fears of long term illness.
Ultimately Mel and Ian write with such wit, honesty, and genuine feeling, that
this book is a joy to read. Can't wait to recommend to everyone I know!"
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On November 1st 2007, as Mel was recovering from Lymphoma
and had just spent two weeks in hospital with pneumonia, I decided to start
writing a blog on the internet. Initially it was help me let out some of
the stuff I was keeping in, but also, it was to enable us all, when Mel was
better, to look back at the journey we had been on. So began "One Day at a
Time" on MySpace. As our daily lives unfolded and events changed,
sometimes on an hourly basis, the blog became a useful tool in letting friends
and family know how Mel was feeling and also how we were all dealing with day to
day life.
Every day, sometimes in the early hours of the morning, or sat at Mel's bedside
in hospital whilst she slept I would tap away on the keyboard. The tears,
the laughter (we did laugh sometimes), the joy at good news and the heartbreak
when bad news was received were all relayed.
In January, inspired by the blog of her online friend
Hayley and my own, Mel began to do the same. Like myself, she talked with honesty and
shot from the hip in telling friends, family and other sufferers what living
with Lymphatic cancer was really like for her. One of the many sad things is that
Melissa will never know how, through her words, she helped and inspired others,
not just from the UK, but from across the world.
After Mel had passed away, I decided to use our
respective blogs and write Mel's story. My one concern was that with the
story having the saddest of endings, I didn't want to scare people.
Seventy-five per cent of people in Mel's situation do recover and that has to be
remembered. In writing Mel's story I wanted to convey her bravery and
courage whilst at the same time be informative about how you deal with life when
you're given this awful news. The help that is available from charitable
organisations. The help that isn't available from the government, if, like
Mel, you're a student. How do you cope with the waiting, the watching, the good
news and the bad. I also want to put across how we, as parents, dealt with
(and continue to deal with) these life changing events.
In 2005, Mel was the subject of a book called One night
in the City. A book of photographs, taken by myself as Liverpool
supporters enjoyed winning the Champions League Final in dramatic fashion.
The company that published that book, Birkenhead Press, agreed to publish
this book and kindly offered to do this and charge us only for materials. The price of the book
is £10.00. All profits on books sold by ourselves were divided between The Queen's Hospital at
Burton on Trent and the Nottingham City Hospital and £1 from every book sold
was donated to the Lymphoma Association. We launched the book on 11th May
2009 and twelve months later to the day presented cheques to the two hospitals
for £400 each. The previous day we'd presented a cheque to the Lymphoma
Association for £200. As with all events such as these, all I wanted to do
was to turn to Mel and say "Look at what we did Mel"...
The feedback from those who have read it has been
excellent and St. Giles Hospice use it as a resource book. It also forms
the basis of some of my talks, details of which can be found elsewhere on this
site.
The book is called One Day at a Time.
Ordering
"One Day at a Time - Mel's Story"
We have decided that in
future, if anyone would like to read our story we will make the original file
copy available. The book can still be bought from Amazon and other online
stores and also from the publisher, however we feel that now is the time to
close the book... on the book so to speak.
I have recently sent out copies
to the National Palliative Care Council and also the Marie Curie Palliative
Institute in Liverpool and they will use our story to help forward their work -
'Look at what we did Mel'
The file copy that I send
out is the original file copy that was sent to the publishers for printing.
The file is only 1MB in size. If you would like to order the book in file
copy form please email me at
ian@mad4mel.co.uk and I will send it to you. If you would like to make
a donation, please click on the Sponsor Me button on this website and you can
then donate to my charity cycle ride fund, but there is no obligation.